


Patchwork History

by magdalyna



Category: Bandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-03
Updated: 2013-11-03
Packaged: 2017-12-31 08:59:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1029800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magdalyna/pseuds/magdalyna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bill may or may not sleep with his band.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Patchwork History

**Author's Note:**

> Fic Imitates Music Prompt challenge fic where I got Death Cab For Cutie - 'Tiny Vessels'

Someone like home

They are best friends first. It takes them three years to circle around each other, learning flaws and thoughts and talents. Learning how far they can go before having to back down. They are each other’s best and worst habit, a harmless kind of peer pressure. 

Bill keeps a little gem of information to himself: Sisky enables him, doesn’t know _how_ to say no to him.

It’s not Bill’s secret but he maintains radio silence about it anyway.

Only when they’re alone does Bill call him Adam, breathy and dirty in his ear as Bill pushes two slick fingers inside of him. Adam will arch against him, keening sharply.

They don’t really stop, but they drift and slide into something to the left of friends with benefits. 

 

Fight song

There was always tension and bad feelings, always fighting. When they formed a band together inside of a shitty, cramped apartment, they thought maybe all that tension was sexual. 

They have really rough sex, all nails and teeth and blunt fingers edging into shoulders. 

Tenderness seeps in afterwards, when they’re flushed and sweaty and spent, clawing up space like an alley cat. 

Bill always calls him Carden, never his given name, when they’re alone. Thus Carden knows this is a flimsy waste of time before someone better comes along. Really, Bill is just being helpful. 

They always fight, aren’t really friends but allies. It’s what makes the music do dynamic, so good. 

It ends like it began: unexpectedly and with a brutal kickpunchkiss. 

 

Polaroid

It is very possible they are more explosive than Bill and Carden were, which vaguely amazes Bill whenever the thought crosses his mind. 

Neither can stop, are greedy, selfish, want moremoremore. More skin, more pressure, more touch me, more moving, more please just fucking _move_. 

Tom thinks in snapshots and Bill always wants to be the subject. It should have worked. 

Tom sing-songed to him once, slurring _‘he is beautiful but he don't mean a thing to me’_ and Carden just raised an eyebrow, asking if Tom had his pronouns right. Bill had the feeling he’d just been quoted at, but he doesn’t really feel like finding out. 

When Tom is forced out, Carden acts like he wants to be the next Unabomber when he grows up, Butcher looks ill and Sisky keeps his comments to himself. 

Hear, see, speak no evil. The phrase always jumped out at Bill in the oddest times. 

Sisky keeps Bill’s secrets. 

The thing is, Tom fooled himself, fooled himself with being with Bill, everyone does. 

It’s an easy mistake. 

It’s not Bill’s fault that no one seems to fit with him right. It’s not his fault he can’t really care that much about people he’s just having fun with. 

 

Wistful musical chairs

Jon never really had a formal introduction to William. 

Being in the Chicago scene in a band meant knowing of anyone one else who was ever in a band in the last five years. You just knew them and that was how it was. 

Bill hadn’t tried anything with him since he wasn’t keen on doing the entire Chicago scene. 

And the way Tom acted around Jon was a huge tip off. 

Bill knows that if their roles were reversed and Tom had been flirting at Sisky like some creepy stalker, Bill would have had the same murderous expression on his face.

So mostly, they hang out, drunkenly slurring 19th century philosophy at each other while half of his band watches with interest or are passed out. 

It still stings like an acid wash when Jon nances off to fix the delightfully sweet upstarts’ problems. Bill likes the Panic boys, he truly does, but it still burns that they had to co-headline _their_ own tour. 

He hadn’t even been able to move in on the singer, by the death glare the guitarist _and_ the drummer were sending his way whenever he got within a three foot radius of the boy. 

 

Calm like a ~~bomb~~ veggie burger

The Butcher is an incredibly soothing influence once they start.

Bill likes tracing The Butcher’s tattoos with his fingers, mapping it all out like Braille and then kissing where his hands were. 

The Butcher likes holding Bill’s hips as he thrusts in time to Bill humming out new lyrics, new melodies to him that Carden will suggest in their planning sessions. 

When they stop, because everyone stops it with Bill sooner or later, it’s peaceful and friendly, because it’s The Butcher who does it. 

He knew that their easy thing wasn’t what Bill needed before they even really started. Bill wonders when it will be his turn to have that kind of clarity. 

 

This is not ~~droid~~ skeevey dude you are looking for

Bill never really felt the need to say any sort of saccharine phrasing about his feelings to Chizz because he thinks that asking a vaguely creepy homeless Australian to join your band is proof enough of something meaningful. 

Also, that fact that they fuck relentlessly for three weeks after this should say something. 

Bill knows its super casual when Chizz tells him that this won’t last. No one really has that kind of insightful honesty anymore. 

It turns out ok because Bill walks in on Chizz and The Butcher kissing and groping each other a week later in a random venue supply closet. 

 

Four corners

Meeting Gabe and Travis and Maja is the best thing that has ever happened to Bill besides his band, his music. 

They fit in the voids in each other. They have really awesome sex besides. 

They _get_ him in ways no one else has. 

He doesn’t get to see them often but when he does, it’s thrilling and stable and perfect. 

 

Lying may work

Bill catches Sisky and Carden going at it one time. It was rough, not like how Carden was with him, but still not soft and sweet. 

He joins them, once (twicethricewho’scounting?), he and Sisky going down on each other as Carden slurs indistinct insults at Bill and fucks Sisky with staccato force. 

In the morning, Sisky is splayed out between them, Carden reaching for both of them, nails waiting. 

Bill and Sisky have matching bite marks on their collarshoulderneck that Sisky leaves bare and Bill covers with his leftover shirt. Bill busies himself with wondering when the blood vessels will heal, when the bruises will fade. 

Carden looks especially smug. 

Bill decides that that will be the last time he ever matches Jaeger and Cuervo shot for shot. The difference in lying to yourself and lying to others is in the belief in denial. 

 

Personal growth may be a myth

In the time that they’ve known each other, Bill and Sisky have a system:

Sisky doesn’t know how to say no and Bill doesn’t know how not to ask. 

It has painstakingly evolved:

Now Bill doesn’t always request things even if he wants something and Sisky ignores most of what he asks. Hear no evil. 

Instead of moremoremore it’s more more more. 

This is not personal growth in the strictest sense, but Bill is willing to settle. 

Sisky mouths _‘this is the moment that you know, that you told you loved him but you don't’_ onto his chest one time (maybe more, yes more, but Bill doesn’t count the times, doesn’t ask –why? who? what?) after a round of just them and Bill did not speak.

Bill knows that in the morning Sisky will go back to Carden and Bill will go back to waiting for Gabe and Travis to tour with him, for Maja to be in the States. 

For now though, they lie together.


End file.
